Miami Vice (2006)

SKINOPSIS

Not really taking place in Miami, a noticably cracked out Colin Farrell (Crockett) and a just plain weird-looking Foxx (Tubbs) nod to each other a lot and focus on looking cool, calm and greasy. Lot's a graphic violence, no on-screen drug use, and not nearly enough sex (and for God's sake, Mann - where's the pastels?), this flick doesn't even remotely resemble the classic TV show that we love like we love any Don Johnson vehicle (Nash Bridges: The Movie where are you???). Flying body parts and blood splatters are cool but let's be honest, they didn't hire Gong Li for her acting skills or her grasp of the English language. We see brief shots of her tits and skin and that's about it. There's a shower to sex scene with Foxx and Naomie Harris (Who plays TV Crockett's love interest Gina Calabrese! What!?) with some breasts, but guess what? Harris had a Body double! Boo! Fuck! Fuck! Where's Sheena Easton when you need her?