My Bloody Valentine 3D

REVIEW
There seems to be some sort of perverse rule afoot in this overwhelmingly glut of horror remakes. It plays out something like this: if the original had a lot of nudity, then the remake will have little to none; but if the original was tragically nudity-insufficient, then the remake will do whatever it can to make up for it. Luckily for this remake, the original My Bloody Valentine was nudie-free. So, here amongst the many gut-wrenching scenes of murderous miner vengeance, we are treated to an extended nudie scene from gorgeous Betsy Rue so fucking jaw-droppingly magnificent that we have trouble believing it came from a movie that actually got a wide theatrical release. See, first sweet Betsy's rocking out on a dude's cock in a motel room exposing her nice titties and a hint of bush. But, it doesn't end there. Then, the dude wants to split, but she grabs a gun and chases him out to the parking lot... without bothering to put any clothes on! Awesome, all three Bs get incredible amounts of screen time as she chases the boyfriend out only to get chased back into the motel by the killer. Overall, she's completely fucking naked for something like six or seven minutes before she gets butchered... still naked. Later, we are shown footage of Betsy naked from various perspectives at different points throughout the movie. Guess, they wanted to milk this naked hottie for all she was worth. And boy did they milk her so good. On top of all that nudealiciousness, the murders are grisly as all fuck, the suspense will leave you white-knuckled and, fuck man, it's in 3D. Finally, a mainstream movie that's actually trying to go balls out.